(Select 8-9 favorite haiku, and write a ¶ of imagined response to 2 favorites.)
the yellowing
pages Jennifer Rule I love the antiquity of this haiku. The image I get from it is completely black and white, as if it was written before color photographs were invented. It reminds me of when I would look through all of my mother's shoeboxes full of photographs from when she was young. The photos of her when she was about my age often resemble me, and my grandmother in the photos would resemble my mother now. It's a strange feeling of when you look at different generations and how similar we really are. Sylvia Hilton |
red with
black lining |
people busily
passing |
nippy morning
. . . |
summer sunset Ann Anderson (6) This haiku created a great image for me. The words that were used in this haiku are so descriptive and make such a vivid image. Summer is my favorite of all seasons, so I just really liked the words such as orange and surrounds is included in the haiku. The sunset surrounding a moon is not something that I see very often, and it almost seems impossible. So, by including these two different ideas, the haiku is very unique and well written. Brianne Dilbeck This haiku has great images in it. The early moon surrounded by the orange of the setting sun is just really appealing, and it really hints at summer because the moon is normally only out at sunset during the late summer. Also the repeated “s” and “r” sounds are used subtly enough so that they do not over power the images used. Also, the cut in between the first and second lines is made extra apparent by stating “the orange” instead of just “orange” for the second line. I feel that this makes an overall better flowing haiku because with out the apparent cut the whole haiku can be said too quickly to really soak up the images. —Casey Wilen |
on the porch Casey Wilen (6) With this haiku, I envision a small country home, in autumn, surrounded by dusty fields. I see an older couple sitting on their old front porch, reminiscing about their younger days together. The dusty air settles on this warm autumn evening, while the sun sets in the distance. Their bench sways with the slight breeze, as does her faded dress. After fifty years, they still enjoy this time together, talking for hours about their lives spent with each other. In the distance a train whistle blows, then quickly the rumble of the train passes by their humble country home. With warming smiles, they catch each other's eyes- knowing that a world of conversation awaits them at the passing of the train. Alida Duff This haiku is Decatur in a way. I have been here long enough and it seems like every time there is a moment where something needs to be said or silence actually matters, the train comes by. Working on the films I have done the last two years, it never fails that every shoot we do around Decatur has at least one take in which the train horn is blowing in the background. I have actually had a really bad train experience. Sophomore year, we had a party at our apartment. There was this girl there who I didn't know very well, but had met her a few times. I will leave out names. So, we are drinking and having a good old time. We were both on the porch talking to each other. Things were getting a little friendlier, I had my arm around her. When the correct moment arose, I leaned in to kiss her. I was right about to and she was there and leaning in as well. A second before our lips met, the train blew it's horn. I jumped in the air and so did she, in the process, I dumped my drink all over her. I went in to get her a towel and a new shirt. When I came back out, she was walking down the stairs to go to her place to change. She ended up not coming back that night and nothing ever happened between us. Colby Hanik While the train may signify the interrupting factor, of the conversation which serves as the poems focal point/topic, I place the emphasis of the poem on the silence that is created by the train. The poem does not insinuate that the conversation has stopped necessarily, but I feel the silence as the train passes. I see the two sitting on the porch on a warm night, smoking cigars, and enjoying their friendship. The silence is not uncomfortable nor unwelcome, yet a relaxed pause. —Jennifer Toney 'On the porch" is such a MU haiku. Those damn trains that come along at just the best parts in the conversation while you are out on the porch...It makes you wonder if those engineers blow the horns so loud and long just to piss us off. —Travis Meisenheimer |
cooler of
beer |
sink of suds |
family memories |
bitterly
cold |
bulky groceries Sylvia Hilton I like the form of this haiku. It is simple, but it contains all of Lee Gurga's essential elements for a haiku. It is brief, contains a seasonal reference, and it uses the cutting technique. And it uses the cutting technique very well (aided by punctuation). There are many nouns in the haiku--images for the reader to latch onto, and it is sensory, too. Perhaps a mundane form, but nothing short of excellence. —Nick Curry |
bright light |
light march
rain |
a cold drizzle |
midnight
swim Katie Steimann (9) "midnight swim" is perhaps the best of the bunch in my opinion. It has a nice seasonal element and a very nice image of the moon's reflection upon the water and two fingers swirling around that image. I can picture a warm summer night out in the country where there are no lights but it's not totally dark because the moon is full and casting a lot of light. There is probably a pick-up truck around somewhere too with the clothes belonging to the swimmers in it. I can't really picture more because the ripply image of the moon is the centerpiece. —Travis Meisenheimer I like this haiku because it evokes clear images in my imagination. I can easily picture swimming in the dark, the only illumination form the moon. I especially love the last two lines. —Nick Curry |
uninvited, Nick Curry I enjoy the form of this haiku. The comma after "uninvited" causes me to pause longer than I normally would. The term makes me feel uncomfortable. No one really enjoys an uninvited guest. Then the second line "you make me tea" soothes my discomfort, as I imagine being sick and having someone to take care of me. But then the reader is thrown back into a shocking situation after the last line "and drink it too". The surprise element really adds interest to the haiku. I also enjoy the play on words; it reminds me of the phrase "have your cake and eat it too." Sylvia Hilton |
late night
swim Katie Steimann (5) I really enjoyed how this haiku was set up. I like the way it talks of the person emerging from the center and those words are arranged in the center of the page. It was a very creative way to get the readers attention and focus on the word center. Alison Burns It's a hot summer night, so a young couple has elected to go swimming in a nearby lake. The air is muggy and crickets are chirping, but the cool water is refreshing. The young woman is taking a short break from swimming and sits on a towel by the side of the lake, watching her boyfriend try to impress her with his goofy swimming tricks. He has just finished performing an underwater headstand and rights himself, emerging from the water right in the middle of the bright moon's reflection. Slowly, he wades his way to the edge of the lake to join her on the towel. I also like how the form of this one kind of echoes the ripples in the water made by the man wading through. Or, the middle two lines could be the man emerging from the moon's reflection in the water. Very clever. —Jenny Schultz |
clear summer
night Tony Douglass (3) Again, this haiku reminds me of summer, especially the Fourth of July. Each year for the Fourth of July, my family would have a huge picnic. My grandma lived right by the lake, which is where the fireworks were every year. So, each me and my cousins would hang out outside all day and eat good food, then walk to the lake to watch the fireworks. This became an annual event for my family. That is why I really liked this haiku and related to it so well. Brianne Dilbeck When I was young I always loved the fireworks, and I still do. I also was always a fan of the finale, because it was such an assault on the senses. This haiku reminds me of all the little fireworks at the end that just go BOOM, and don't really have any pretty colors associated with them, because they just light up the sky for a split second, and I there is enough of them, they do that crazy choppy strobe light thing, and everyone is moving like a robot. This haiku captures that feeling so well for me, especially the delayed boom and the flashing, it just makes me think of summer, BBQ's, and nice weather. —Casey Wilen |
empty bed Alison Burns I really enjoyed this haiku. I was able to feel the emptiness this person was feeling when they wrote it. The element of smell was also addressed in a very impact way. Surprise was also used well also, you don't really know what is going on you could take it that this person is in a long distance relationship and then you find out that they are gone forever. Alison Burns |
flipped car |
leaving the
terminal |
I did the right
thing . . . Leigh Kitchell (7) |
summer evening Megan Minogue I am really drawn to this one because nights when there are no winds are the best nights ever. When you normally think of a chime, it takes almost nothing to make it chime. This haiku describes an evening that is so calm that the wind chime is not even making noise. I picture an older man sitting on the porch of his farm house, looking towards the horizon where deer are feeding in the fields. Tony Douglass |
first fresh
snowfall |
new day |
bleak hours
on the bus |
spring breeze |
broken vase Julia Shaver I imagined a rainy day. I saw two younger children playing inside the house because it was raining, and they couldnt go outside to play. Their mom had told them several times during the day to settle down because someone was going to get hurt or something broken. However, they did not listen. Once again they began running around the house, except this time one of them ran into their moms vase. It fell and broke all over the floor. I imagined both of them trying to blame it one each other, but they both ended up crying because they were both in trouble. I thought that this haiku was kind of funny because I think everyone can relate to this situation in one way or another! Jennifer McGeehon |
solitary
piano |
carefree
kisses |
spring shower |
fathoms below
reflected stars |
midsummer
sky Casey Wilen (3) |
last night |
photo dark
room Abe Millikin (12) I like this haiku a lot. The way that the author chose to structure this haiku was very beneficial to the overall effect of the haiku. By spacing out the word develop, it draws the reader to the last word and its effect. The word has dual meanings in the haiku and can be representative of the actual love between the two people or the photos that depicted them. I think that this author was creative when they chose to write this haiku in that structure. Jennifer Rule I really liked this haiku because it can be interpreted in different ways. It is almost ironic because the words are film words but yet they are used in a different sense. It made me laugh but I know that the haiku isn't funny. I thought this haiku was very clever. Julia Shaver This haiku is written very well. I find it very clever, because I see a couple in a dark room developing their pictures from a romantic weekend get-a-way. As they look at the pictures they are reminded at how much there love is forever and growing. Sometimes you run through the motions of love, but when you stop and look at a picture it makes you really see the beauty in something, or in this case the development of love. For me personally, I take the word develop and I look at it as if they are watching there actual love develop, however one can interpret it as a couple in a dark room simply developing there romantic pictures develop. The word develop is tricky and leads the reader into many different directions. Megan Minogue I really liked this haiku. From it, I pictured a girl who was on a class trip of some sort where she began to fall for a boy on the trip. They hung out together the whole time they were there and documented everything with her camera. When they get back from the trip, she can't wait to develop her pictures from the trip. As she works in the darkroom, the first image hits the developer and slowly takes her back to that moment which completely reassured her that she loves this boy. —Ben Kress This haiku presents such a neat picture (no pun intended!) It takes the reader to a dark room, without much color. There, I see a woman who has been at work all day developing pictures. She's hot, sweaty, and tired. But she has saved the best part of the day for last - the pictures of the weekend adventure with her new fiancé. This weekend was a fairy tale - the day that he asked for her hand in marriage. As she developed the pictures, she smiled to herself in that dark, private room. She knows in her heart of hearts that he is the one for her - perfect, her knight in shining armor. I think that throughout their relationship she has gone through the same routine - waiting to develop their pictures until last so that she would have something to look forward to. Smiling to herself as she sees the smiles on the pages develop is not a rare occasion in that dark room. —Maureen Coady Sometimes the haiku that are shaped differently seem forced and contrived. I don’t always see the point in trying to make it look different. This one I really could see, though. I’ve been in photography classes before, and I know how it is to wait in anticipation to see that photo you were so excited about. I really like how the “develop” is so far away, we’re waiting for it to develop, too. We want to see if the love is going to work out or not. We want to see if the photo is going to develop. Where is it going? I think the form of this haiku worked perfectly! —Juliana Helt |
building
the snow fort Cliff Ault (7) |
lying on
blankets Molly Pufall I can see a couple lying in each other's arms on an empty beach with no care in the world just them. I wish I was there and i can see myself with a girl just holding her in my arms watching the stars and the waves of the ocean crash. Mike Mays |
sun on the
horizon |
rubbing sleep
away |
lightning
strikes |
tear streaked
face |
moonlit
shadows |
rusted beer
cans |
my path to
you Jennifer Toney (3) I find this haiku incredibly playful. I picture a boy and a girl, who are attracted to one another, goofing around in the cornfields. I imagine them sort of playing hide and seek, and then boy is hiding down a certain row. The girl is getting closer and closer to his location by listening to his voice. As she is calmly walking towards the boy, she becomes more anxious to find him and begins to pick up the pace ever so slightly. With her pace a little faster, the girl’s hair begins to get thrown around by the wind. I picture her hair long and sun streaked golden; very ideal on a naturally beautiful girl. Perhaps the reason I automatically assumer her hair is golden is because of the second line in the haiku, “a tunnel of golden stalks”. I like associating the girl’s hair to the stalks because I think there is a neat, simple connection between the two. —Molly Pufall |
gazing upward Ben Kress (5) My boyfriend and I enjoy camping and we say that true camping is done in tents. I, however, do not enjoy the spiders that come along when we go. I remember every night we would crawl into the tent and have to do a spider check before we would go to bed. I would check the blankets and pillows while he sprayed bug spray around the tent to kill the sneaky ones.For the first few minutes after settling down, I would stare at the ceiling of the tent just waiting for the spiders to emerge. I would fall asleep only when I was so exhausted and couldnt keep my eyes open. Then I would burrow into the covers and pull them around my head so that I wouldnt feel anything crawling on me. As long as I did this and my boyfriend was right next to me, I could sleep. This haiku is reality for me. It represents every camping trip for me. Jennifer Rule |
old memories Jenny Schultz |
drunken night Jennifer Toney (5) This particular haiku doesn’t actually provoke any real images, like most haiku do for me. Instead, this time, this haiku makes me feel better about my own life! In college, random hook ups are common, and unfortunately, a lot of them don’t mean anything. Many times it means something to one of the people, and not the other, and I think this haiku shows that it can be both sided. He might be drunk, but maybe it’s because he’s too chicken shit to actually stay over and deal with what might happen. I don’t know. I just feel better about my current situation after reading this haiku! Phew! —Juliana Helt |
full
moon |
first day
of school alida Duff (3) I can relate to this haiku, which is why I like it so much. As a child I remember being so excited for school. I had the perfect outfit, the perfect lunch box along with the perfect backpack. Parents really try to pump up that first day of school by getting you all kinds of neat little accessories. At least my parents did, but no matter how many goodies parents buy you, or no matter how hard they try to get you excited to go to school, the moment you step foot in that class room and see strangers the tears come streaming down. The first day of school is so scary, and this haiku puts me back in that element. I see this frightened little girl, who was once ecstatic about her new purple backpack, but who now can't help but cry all over it. Megan Minogue |
old hangout Travis Meisenheimer (5) It reminds me of walking through the trees/creek behind my house. That and everytime I mow the grass. I can see the summers that we spent playing baseball in my back yard, all of our little meaning less aruguments and the unforgettable memories that I will always cherish because of that summer. Mike Mays |
with you |
the year
is done |
tearless eyes scan the ashes love up in flames |
saving one
tree |
magnolia
blossoms |
belly to
the bar Ted Blifnick I really liked this edit of the original haiku. It gives the poem a little more depth and more innuendos, which I always enjoy. Jimmy is not saying Jim Beam and single's day doesn't say Valentine's Day, but both mean what it is. I always enjoy poems which have an "inside" joke, but not really. There are jokes where you just need to think about it. I just think the edits are very clever and it made me enjoy the poem. I picked it as one of my favorites the first time it was in the kukai and now I like it more. Colby Hanik |
soul mates
lie Jenny McGeehon (9) |
last feast before
Nick Curry (2) |
rolling credits we share popcorn salty lips |
early morning
meeting Alida Duff (3) The form of this haiku really helps set the mood of chaos in the way it is presented. Each line is very small and concise, leading up to a final point at the end of the haiku. Also, because each line is further indented than the previous one, that also helps ignite a rushed feeling, that something ahead is what is important. In this case, it is realizing, after a hectic and likely important morning, that the person’s socks do not match. Aside from the form, I enjoy the humorous aspect of this haiku. So maybe it is more of a senyru because it is mainly about human nature, rather than mother nature. Either way, I still enjoy the simplicity in the lines. The moment is delivered effectively in a subtle way. The moment is not thrown in the reader’s face. Often like with humor, when it is thrown in our faces, we tend not to think it is that funny. But if something is subtly presented, the humorous aspect is much easier to appreciate. —Molly Pufall |
beneath my feet Jenny Schultz |
hot cocoa from scratch the bottom of the pot burned |
new red dress |
re Travis Meisenheimer (8) I really like the form used in this haiku. To me, this haiku is a very unique haiku. The way she scrambles the letters around really emphasizes the fact that the person is rearranging something. Not too many times would you see a form like this, but this really fits it perfectly. Tony Douglass I really like the way this person formed this haiku. It does what the word means and I thought this was very clever. I also liked how it didn't really give you a picture until the last line you can feel the cold. You can feel the almost annoyance of this haiku because of the words used and the way it is written. Julia Shaver This was one of my favorite haiku! I really enjoyed the form of this haiku. This was a very creative way of displaying the message. Even though I do not get an image from this haiku, the form illustrates the image that the writer is trying to display. The use of form is very effective in this haiku! Jennifer McGeehon I really like this haiku as well. The form of it is genius. The use of multiple lines and spaced, chopped words really makes this haiku very strong. The use of the multiple lines and chopped words confuses the reader and makes it hard to understand it at first, which makes you want to read it again. Then you understand the reason for the chaos and feel the authors struggle. You really feel the sacrifices the author is making in this haiku and this works only because of the chopped words and multiple lines. —Ben Kress The display of the word “rearranging” is just brilliant and shows just how much the narrator has compromised his life for this person, a person who clearly doesn't share his feelings. In fact, like Winter, this person is indifferent to the narrator's efforts at accommodating her. The visual aspect of this haiku is at least as important, if not more so, than the actual words. The word “rearranging” is like a puzzle that has been taken apart - you can still tell how it is supposed to go together, but since you've already begun the process of taking it apart, there's really no point in trying to put it back together quite yet. —Jenny Schultz The form in the haiku is so effective! I think that in life today, many couples are forced to readjust themselves to learn how to get along with their significant other. Learning to co-exist with someone is not something that happens over night, it is a growth process; a time when a man and a woman learn about each other and learn how to “deal” with the other person's habits and oddities. In this haiku I see a woman who is slightly frustrated at rearranging and adjusting she has had to do. She even claims that she is becoming indifferent about change; is she beginning to stop caring about her true identity as she attempts to adjust her life to co-exist with her significant other. I definitely sense anger and resentment in this haiku; but the form is what makes it! —Maureen Coady |
night at the movies nervous hands reach for hers Tony Douglass (5) I really like the form of this haiku. It's almost as if the sentence slides across the page, as the boy's hand slides to the girl's. I see a high school age boy and girl on their first date at the movie theatre. They share a tub of salty yellow popcorn and a few nervous smiles, but little conversation ensues. Wanting him to take her hand, she strategically places her hand directly on the armrest. Glancing down at her hand, he questions in his mind, 'should I do it? What if she gets mad? What will I do?' He wants to make contact with the beautiful girl sitting next to him, but he's just to scared that she'll get upset with him. She glances out of the corner of her eye, thinking to herself, 'why doesn't he just take my hand already?!?' After half the movie spent contemplating his move rather than watching the movie, he decides to go for it. He reaches over to her resting hand and takes hold. They exchange blushing smiles, and look back to the screen. Simultaneously, they each think to themselves, "Yes!" Alida Duff Every March for the past 4 years, I have attempted to rekindle a past friendship. I don’t know why the spring brings my longing feelings for this friend, yet I continually seek out and eventually spend time with this person. Usually after a successful visit or two, we leave each other with no expectations of seeing each other for another long stint of time. However, ever March the feelings return and I once again seek them out. —Jennifer Toney |
sipping tropical
drinks with hundreds of men . . . |
watching
television |
|
interstates and gas mileage valentines
|
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2004, Randy Brooks Millikin University
All rights returned to authors upon publication.