1 Tan-renga Favorites • Global Haiku • Millikin University • Fall 2019

silence in the house
I let the blanket of it
wash over me

down the street
church bells ring

Maddie Curtin & Madeline Wilson

silence in the house
I let the blanket of it
wash over me

in the quiet stillness—
rejuvenation

Maddie Curtin & Gillian Gernado

summer camp
I hold a paper bag
full of lemon drops

a hand reaches in
without me realizing

Elizabeth Napier & Joel Ochoa

 

hospital room
the oxygen tank
his only company

third floor cafeteria
a young women sits alone

Joel Ochoa & Madeline Wilson

I love this response. Two different people in similar circumstances both alone together. I want to know more about each of them, do they have a past? What is it? Why are each of them there, and would they be happier if they met? I want them to meet and become close so neither of them have to be alone, and they can be alone together. I love how Madeline didn't focus more on the man in the original haiku, and instead created more of a world inside this haiku. Maddie Curtin, Fall 2019

I like the different perspectives in this haiku. The addition to the haiku adds another layer that may not always be thought of the loved ones effected. I imagine a woman in her mid-20’s wondering what they are going to do when time nears the end and how they will pay for the bill. Then switching to the hospital room, you can hear the emptiness of the hospital room being filled by the sound of breathing. The entire haiku gives the reader an uneasy feeling and a feeling of not knowing what to do next. Jessi Kreder, Fall 2019

When I read this haiku, I thought about how interesting the comparison these two have in common. It is interesting to think because this woman may have lost her love one and now, she is alone and the man in the oxygen tank could have everyone leave him. These two individuals are remarkably close yet so far because they do not know each other, and they cannot help each other get through a rough time. I can really hear this poem as well with the sounds of the room with the oxygen tank and the woman in the cafeteria because everyone is having their own conversation there and she is completely alone. This poem was just very sad and also a harsh reality that many people go through everyday and you feel so awful for those people only to try and make their lives better. Michael Hoelting, Fall 2019

backyard
I notice
new flowers

day 26 of the Zoloft
I recognize color again

Victoria Stuart & Maddie Curtin

motionless
the doll's eyes
reflect the lonely moon

a slight twitch
she lives to haunt

Michael Hoelting & Rebecca Jaffe

 

alone in white
I try on
my mother’s dress

understanding in that moment
why he always confuses me for her

Victoria Stuart & Gillian Gernado

I really liked this Tan-renga because I felt like they went very well together. I thought the link fit really well with the first one while going in a very different direction at the same time. I thought the words made the imagery of the tan-renga very strong which made the haiku a lot stronger and more enjoyable to read. I thought the link especially added a whole new interesting idea that built on the first haiku which was really awesome. I thought both were very strong and they told a great story which is why it was one of my favorites. Joel Ochoa, Fall 2019

alone in white
I try on
my mother’s dress

train flowing
15 years later

Victoria Stuart & Rebecca Jaffe

sun gazing on
the stadium
empty at halftime

what I would do for
one game on that polished turf

Jon Kuebler & Michael Hoelting

 

all alone
will this last forever?
she asks the winter moon

and in return,
silence

Rebecca Jaffe & Madeline Wilson

all alone
will this last forever?
she asks the winter moon

as it stares back
at your glowing face

Rebecca Jaffe & Jessi Kreder

I liked this one before it was capped, and I like it even better now despite the fact it is more relatable than ever. Obviously, the moon is never going to answer our questions no matter how many haiku we write to it (unless…?), but when you feel alone, and the moon really is your only company, you really do think the loneliness might last forever. Asking out loud if, or when, it will end demonstrates how unbearable this feeling is. Stating even then that no one answered them makes it seem even lonelier. Charlize Pate, Fall 2019

Mississippi River
much larger than
the last time I saw her

what does she think
of me?

Meghan Hayes & Madeline Wilson

 

date night
all I hear is
dogs barking

the neighbor's poodle
won't shut up

Michael Hoelting & Rebecca Jaffe

date night
all I hear is
dogs barking

drowned voice clear bark
a never ending night

Michael Hoelting & Victoria Stuart

old man’s kneecaps
knotty oaks
still standing

yet his smile
looks oh so young

Morgan Bode & Jessi Kreder

 

old city streets
are the ghosts in you
or me?

cobblestone road leads me
deeper into the abyss

Madeline Wilson & Gillian Gernado

heading out the door
I turn to say goodbye—
you're no longer there

every day getting harder
to walk alone

Meghan Hayes & Michael Hoelting

sleepless night
in a bed without you
black hole

distance separating
your sins against me

Maddie Curtin & Jon Kuebler

This haiku and response go perfectly together. Each phrase contains such a level of tension and an unspoken story that it allows me or anyone else to imagine what happened. The haiku allows a person to interpret the mood and whether the black hole is negative towards a person or just a feeling of emptiness; then the responses offers an interpretation of that scene while still leaving the details open. The diction of each section is just great. Ben Kuxmann, Fall 2019

starry sky
i try to feel
your presence

i am starting to forget
the sound of your voice

Maddie Curtin & Cassie Reed

This is one of the Tan Renga that I thought was done very well. It seems to me that these two seperate links connect in a very strong way. What I also really liked about this one was that I responded to the first haiku by Maddie and interpreted it in such a different way. I attempted to take it down the more natural side of haiku writing whereas Cassie went down the more personal route. It was very interesting to see how she interpreted it and how she even managed to keep her two lines to the consciousness of ten words. I think seeing how we interpreted the first link in two different ways is just indicative of how great the process of Tan-Rengas are, and how much fun it is to right them. John DeAngelo, Fall 2019

I enjoy this tan-renga a lot because the second two lines is an interesting complement to the original haiku, and because it causes the mood to completely shift. Before, I read the haiku as a lovesick person missing their long distance significant other, but after the complement, it feels more like a poem of grief. I can feel the pain that the writer is feeling. I can see the stars and the way they cause them to think of whoever is not there. I am always intrigued by the power two lines can have to completely overhaul the meaning of a haiku. Madeline Wilson, Fall 2019

 

starry sky
i try to feel
your presence

a whistle of wind passes
it tickles my nose

Maddie Curtin & John DeAngelo

I enjoyed the change in mood throughout this Tan Renga. The original haiku by Maddie is wonderfully written, and creates a clear, very relatable moment in time. The main vibe of this haiku seemed sad, as the author wished for someone they missed. The response lines by John changed this mood, while still connecting to Maddie’s haiku. Furthermore, the words “whistle” and “tickles” brings a sense of joy and relief, as the author begins to feel the presence of the person they are long for. Therefore, I enjoyed each of their haiku, and how the mood shifted but the moment stayed the same. Tori Stuart, Fall 2019

I like this pair because it follows the rule of putting a natural image after a human or emotional image. The haiku has an emotional feeling which puts the reader in a state of reflection on relationships and emotional struggle, but the two-line companion focuses back on the world surrounding human struggles and puts it into perspective. The wind is a calming force which grounds this haiku and refocuses the readers energy. Morgan Bode, Fall 2019

I enjoy this tan-renga because John adds an element of imagery to this poem. Maddie describes the emotional feeling, while John adds in the physical feeling. I can imagine standing outside in the summertime, missing someone special. The tickle of the wind on my nose might bring me back down to earth. I see the whistle of the wind (great alliteration) as a way to bring me back to reality from my dreamlike state. Rebecca Jaffe, Fall 2019

open arms
my mother greets
my fiancé

acceptance
what a wonderful feeling

Benjamin Kuxmann & Cassie Reed

 

ears ringing
laying my head
on the pillow

gunshots and screams
on repeat in my head

Victoria Stuart & Cassie Reed

I really liked that I could hear this poem as I read it. The calmness in the first 3 lines with the distress of the ringing combined with the disturbing images of the fourth/fifth lines is exceptional. Gunshots and screams is a really scary way to describe murder, and hearing them is heart-dropping. The phrase on repeat was really disturbing, because it felt like there was no control over stopping the gunshots and screams. Overall, this link was chilling, and I can only imagine where this Tan-Renga would go.

grandma’s hands—
liver spot
constellations

her little fingers
finding the big dipper

Gillian Genardo & Joel Ochoa

pressed between
the fresh pages
a worn photo of us

a moment captured
by Kodiak Signet 80

Jessi Kreder & Meghan Hayes

 

thanksgiving
grandpa snorts
at the table

escaping to break
not proofreading my essay

Rebecca Jaffe & Ben Kuxmann

thanksgiving
grandpa snorts
at the table

but—
just a memory

Rebecca Jaffe & Maddie Curtin

what's your biggest fear?
he asks
a warm hand on my thigh

fingers twitch at the urge
to slap his face

Madeline Wilson & Joel Ochoa

 

fire burns
so does my
marshmallow

a late November evening
chilling frost traces the leaves

Victoria Stuart & John DeAngelo

when he pulls away
my lips taste like
sugar

my heart skips
one too many beats

Madeline Wilson & Jessi Kreder

playing tag in the
middle of the store
he and I are young again

store clerk gets mad
we fall into each other giggling

Meghan Hayes & Maddie Curtin

 

dead hitch-hiker
the same haircut
as his mother

cleaning the bedroom
as if he'll come home

Morgan Bode & Ben Kuxmann

The first haiku makes me think of how once people become dirtbags or go off the well beaten path, sometimes they’re not even viewed as humans. The first verse sounds like it’s written by someone who knows the hitchhiker and his mother, but though the viewer knows the hitch hiker, he is not called by his name or referred to by some other term, the body is only that of a hitch hiker. The second verse gives the first haiku more of a story, and is a second perspective in the dead hitch hiker’s life, or lack thereof. We see the mother’s reaction to her son being gone, whether she knows her son is dead or not, she still wants to believe he’ll walk back into his clean room any day. Alex Bergland, Fall 2019

pink backpack
in the trunk
his trophy

slithering out of its hole
snake's breath

Victoria Stuart & Jon Kuebler

the zoo
a collection of plush tigers
for protection

still afraid to go home
for people are scarier

Morgan Bode & Michael Hoelting

 

leafless tree
kids play
in the remains

our modern masterpieces
on display in the condemned factory

Jessi Kreder & Ben Kuxmann

love in the air
surrounded by
sunflowers

his eyes whisper 'forever'
her smile replies

Michael Hoelting & Meghan Hayes

blanket wrapped
around shoulders
brother missing

phone vibrates
amber alert

Maddie Curtin & Madeline Wilson

 

wine elixir
the weight of the world
melts away

he grips my hand
time stops

Madeline Wilson & Meghan Hayes

I really like this tan renga. I feel like it adds so much cuteness into it. I just find it quite adorable. I love holding hands and I think that it is so cute and intimate. I am a sucker for cheesy stuff and this poem is super cheesy. I am a romantic at heart and this really tugs at my heart strings in this sense. Cassie Reed, Fall 2019

I really liked this Tan-Renga because putting this haiku together with Meghan’s two lines paints this story. I could easily picture exactly what was happening in this moment. When I read this pairing, I immediately saw an image of a couple on a couch. They are drinking wine and talking about life. All of a sudden, the boy laces his fingers through the girl’s. She feels like her heart is going to explode. She is so giddy and overcome with happiness that time seems to have stopped. All she sees is him. I get this warm and fuzzy feeling when I read this pair together. I also think this pair is interesting because it adds another person to the narrative. Without Meghan’s lines, I read the haiku as just one person enjoying a glass of wine—maybe watching a movie or reading a book. But, with the lines, I picture the couple. Gillian Genardo, Fall 2019

wine elixir
the weight of the world
melts away

vanishing sun
shadows creeping up my leg

Madeline Wilson & Jon Kuebler

I feel that this pair really enhances the meaning of the original haiku. I felt like the original haiku was finished when the other two lines were added to it. The word choice in the second poem is also very distinct and the words vanishing and creeping really add to the emotional landscape of the haiku. The use of “ing” verbs really makes the poem move. I also enjoy the agency which is given to the sun and the shadows by this verb choice. The shadows movement sticks out to me as something I’ve not seen before in writing. Morgan Bode, Fall 2019

 

wine elixir
the weight of the world
melts away

an unusual warmth
I might forget that in the morning

Madeline Wilson & John DeAngelo

 

wine elixir
the weight of the world
melts away

I hold his hand and my glass
cool summer evening

Madeline Wilson & Victoria Stuart

 

 

 

© 2019, Randy Brooks • Millikin University
All rights returned to authors upon publication.