Tan-renga Capped
Global Haiku • Millikin University • Fall 2024
1 to-do list complete Ava Zukowski to-do list complete Ava & Dayton to-do list complete Ava & Lily to-do list complete to-do list complete Ava & Charley to-do list complete Ava & Meliyah to-do list complete Ava Zukowski & Gracie Shaffer I like the idea that the perspective of this haiku shifts from the mom to her child. It reminds me of how much my mom did for me growing up and how a mother will do anything for her child. Mothers will work themselves to the bone just to ensure their child’s happiness, and they will neglect their personal needs for their child’s at any moment. I think this haiku reflects that nicely. Bella Palermo, Fall 2024 I like this tan-renga a lot because of the instant switch, but also how we talked in class about a difference in perspective. I think that really makes this haiku stand out, that you can read it from either the perspective of the mother or the child. It’s also just a relatable haiku that everyone understands. Finally getting to go to sleep and before you know it you’re awake again. Rachel Nott, Fall 2024 |
2 winning the lottery Rachel Nott winning the lottery Rachel & Dayton I liked the addition to this haiku because even though it made it sad and gave a little taste of neglect, it added something new to the haiku without adding another character which I liked. Abby Wilken, Fall 2024 I know Rachel didn’t want to choose any of the add-ons because it was a little bit sad, but in my opinion, I think it was just a bit funny. I think it’s something that a lot of people have gone through, and not even in a “I had a horrible childhood way.” I can definitely understand where the Mom is coming from here, though, because if I was trying to relax and kept getting bothered by my kid all day I would eventually start just responding without looking up. Matt Kordesh, Fall 2024 winning the lottery Rachel & Abby This tan-renga is a sad version, but I like how it is written. It shows how parents don’t always pay attention to their kids, and that is very heartbreaking to the child. Children require a lot of time and attention so sometimes the parents have a hard time meeting that need. It seems like the family is on vacation, so it is sad that the mom is on her phone rather than enjoying the moments outside with her family. Charley Condill, Fall 2024 winning the lottery little brother’s sandcastle Rachel & Bella
3 ten-minute drive Katelyn Wendt ten-minute drive Katelyn & Caroline I really liked Caroline’s addition to this hokku. I thought that it flowed nicely, and I also feel like the people arriving at their destination is cool because it helps complete the story. My interpretation of the capping lines as that the song ends between the chorus and the bridge, which I think is oftentimes people’s favorite part of the song. It made me think of times when a friend and I arrive right as our favorite part starts playing, so we stay in the car a little longer to finish the song. Katelyn Wendt, Fall 2024 This is my favorite rendition of the renga because I hate when I get to where I’m going at the best part of a song and have to get out and break the rhythm of the song. Sometimes, if I am not in a rush, I will sit and let the song finish out before getting out of my car and doing what I need to do. The addition of the chorus line makes it feel as though the author has missed out on the best part of the song due to how short the drive was, and the feeling of missing that part of the song could ruin the vibe of the car ride. Charlie Armstrong, Fall 2024 |
19 cookies and milk Katelyn Wendt cookies and milk Katelyn Wendt & Matt Kordesh I really enjoyed this tan-renga. The original haiku was already very ominous and question-invoking from the start. The fourth line continues very similarly to the first three but does not add anything too groundbreaking. The fifth line then ties the entire haiku together and gives all the other lines even more meaning. I like how unexpectedly dark this tan-renga is. Dayton Lasack, Fall 2024 cookies and milk Katelyn & Melis cookies and milk Katelyn & Bella cookies and milk Katelyn & Charley
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4 new magnet Caroline Arnold new magnet |
5 toes in the sand Ava Zukowski toes in the sand I like this one because of the drastic change in connotation. The initial haiku is very calm and positive. Where as the following lines completely contrast this. The whole haiku is about the ocean, but the first half and second half are very very different. I think the contrast draws the readers in and gets their attention. Izzy Jones, Fall 2024 |
13 rinsing my sandy feet Natalie Mase rinsing my sandy feet Natalie Mase & Gracie Shaffer |
14 sandcastle village Charley Condill sandcastle village sandcastle village I like this haiku because it reminds me of all the times me and my sisters would attempt to build massive sandcastles at the beach. We would stack up the castles high using buckets, and we would build canals all around the sides. We would always build it way too close to the water and would have to repair damages from the waves. Eventually, so much water would surge up and take the sandcastle away with the tide. I think the fact that the seagull is walking on the flat sand where there is no castle kind of shows how so many people could have built something in that same exact spot, but the tide still washed it away. Ava Zukowski, Fall 2024 I loved this haiku because I took the place in which the seagull was walking where the sandcastle used to stand before the angry wave came to wash it away. This brought me so many emotions because it gives perspective to just how many experiences Sand has seen in one place. One day, a kid may be digging a hole in China, and the next, another is building a sandcastle. Because the tides are always changing, the sand always becomes a blank slate for the next experience. Gracie Shaffer, Fall 2024
6 reds oranges and yellows Ava Zukowski reds oranges and yellows Ava & Rachel I think this tan-renga does a good job of talking about something pretty heavy, grief. The changing of the seasons always reminds me of the time moving on farther from the day that I have lost certain people in my life, and it can be a very bittersweet feeling to think about how we are adjusting to life without them. On one hand, the seasons changing makes me think about how sad it is to have another year without them, but on the other it is comforting to feel the acceptance that comes with making peace with loss. Caroline Arnold, Fall 2024 reds oranges and yellows Ava & Ava |
17 for once Natalie Mase for once Natalie & Natalie I loved the added part of the Tan-Renga. It adds so much more to the haiku. At first you are sad that he didn’t notice you getting ready for him and now you only notice how he is looking at someone else. It is a disappointing time and so heartbreaking. Lily Moore, Fall 2024 for once Natalie & Melis Again I like the relationship between the two halves, The connotations are again opposed. This one starts sad and ends vengeful. I like the sass that this one portrays. It gives off the vibes “I don't need you anyway.” I think the matchup goes very well together but the ending is still very unexpected. Izzy Jones, Fall 2024 I like this tan-renga because it changes the tone of the haiku into a more positive one. It is a girl taking charge and telling her boyfriend that she can do better. If he isn’t going to appreciate her then she isn’t going to stay with him. I love how it is so easy to imagine. The tone starts sad but ends hopeful and empowering. Charley Condill, Fall 2024 I got drawn to this haiku out of the rest of them because of the sassiness at the end. I love that this girl is showing that she still means something, even if the person she originally wanted doesn’t notice. This also goes along with the saying, ‘Everything happens for a reason.’ Maybe the person she originally wanted is no longer a good match for her, but this new person is someone she would’ve never expected. Gracie Shaffer, Fall 2024
18 new years Matt Kordesh new years Mat Kordesh & Lily Moore This tan-renga is probably relatable for a lot of us. I think this is a sweet bonding moment between the aunt and the “me” but I also think it is a good moment between the mom and the aunt, her sister. The aunt is technically breaking a rule it seems, but the mom does not seem to care too much. This may bring up childhood memories of the two sisters breaking rules or getting into trouble, and maybe they are silently reflecting on their childhood together. Caroline Arnold, Fall 2024 I liked this tan-renga because not only does it show a connection between the aunt and the speaker, but a connection between the aunt and her sister. The aunt might be trying to get in the speaker’s good graces by sneaking champagne, which would further improve the relationship. I think that the mom let the speaker get away with drinking the champagne because it might remind her of the “sneaky” things that she once did with her sister when she was younger. Ava Zukowski, Fall 2024 This rendition makes me think of the renga in a more comical manner. We, as young adults, may think we are slick or at good at sneaking things, but our parents, who have seen it all, can see right through it, thus why the mom notices the glass of champagne. However, as we grow older, they give us more freedom, and although maybe mom doesn’t agree, she isn’t going to stop it since there is no harm being done, so I sense a theme of growing up through this version. Charlie Armstrong, Fall 2024 new years Matt & Katelyn I also liked this version of the tan renga because it didn’t add an extra character, but it still added something to the original haiku. I think the addition of another person would change the haiku but this doesn’t and still edits the haiku a bit. Abby Wilken, Fall 2024 |
16 prom pictures Lily Moore prom pictures Lily & Lily prom pictures Lily & Rachel This addition plays well with the original haiku; it’s far from a reversal of the original and it's more than simply going in the same direction. Adding in the character of the husband puts a new cast to the remembrance; a bit of awkwardness, perhaps some shame as you talk about an ex to a current partner. Making these two lines about two people looking at a scrapbook adds in a sense of present-ness that wasn’t very strong in the original (though not totally absent). Closing the scrapbook then adds some finality to the memory; they are done reminiscing about what is over and we are now more fully grounded in the present. Dan Mungons, Fall 2024 prom pictures Lily & Katelyn prom pictures Lily & Izzy prom pictures Lily & Charley prom pictures Lily & Gracie |
23 Mother’s Day brunch
25 the world’s knowledge Ava & Charlie |
24 mind clears Gracie & Charlie |
15 winter break! Dan Mungons winter break! Dan & Maliyah This haiku reminds me of when I was younger, my brother and I would have to help my grandparents rake the leaves in their yard and then we would put them in these cute pumpkin bags that served as halloween decorations. Before we would put the leaves away, we would put them in a big pile and lay in them obviously, and I think this haiku captures a feeling of reflecting on what it was like to be a kid. I know I will be using those pumpkin bags forever because they symbolize that feeling of not having a care in the world as I laid in a dirty pile of leaves. Bella Palermo, Fall 2024 |
7 date night argument Dayton Lasack date night argument Dayton & Caroline |
20 home for the weekend Abby Wilken home for the weekend Abby & Abby |
9 heated debate Katelyn Wendt heated debate Katelyn & Caroline I like how this Tan-Renga starts with a heated debate, and ends with the ending of the argument. The addition of the last two lines simply adds on to the story, and resolves the debate over how to roast a marshmallow. I like the idea that once everyone starts eating their smores, they are all satisfied and not worried about arguing about it anymore. They’re distracted by the delicious taste and the marshmallow getting all over their hands. I also appreciate all of the sensory information in this Tan-Renga, from taste to smell and feeling. Melis Barutcu, Fall 2024 heated debate - alternative edit? |
8 the drive Maliyah Battle the drive Meliyah & Dayton the drive Maliyah Battle & Natalie Mase I liked this tan-renga primarily because of the line “i count the trees.” I love the specificity and the tediousness implied by that statement. Like you have to find something to do. Although, that sentence changed the haiku for me by adding an added element: is the person’s phone dead? Because now it feels like they’re looking for something to entertain them or keep them distracted because their phone is dead. Rachel Nott, Fall 2024 I liked how my original thought for this haiku was continued. Although the intention for haiku is to interpret it to your own experience, I find it exciting when someone gets where you are coming from. My family always opts for driving instead of flying, so the drives are always long. The two lines added are remnant to all of the experiences I've had while on road trips, where I just find myself staring out the window as we slowly inch closer to home. Maliyah Battle, Fall 2024 This hokku was one of my favorites from a previous kukai, and I also really liked these capping lines added on to it. I think that “I count the trees” points to how long the drive feels for this person. They have run out of things to talk about with their friends or family, they’ve run out of road trip games to play, and so now they are trying to entertain themselves by counting trees. I still think that the hokku is great on its own, but I think the capping lines add a lot to it. Katelyn Wendt, Fall 2024 the drive Meliyah & Melis |
11 back on the airplane Caroline Arnold back on the airplane Caroline & Rachel back on the airplane Caroline & Izzy back on the airplane Caroline Arnold & Bella Palermo I love this Tan-Renga because it shifts the tone to something entirely different from how I read the hokku. I initially read it as a reminiscent feeling of leaving a vacation and taking parts of it with you. I think this is still the case, but the last two lines being a different tone. It almost snaps you back into reality by bringing in another character who is affected by the narrator’s action of shaking the sand out of the book. Maybe some sand got on him, and he’s not happy about it. I like this Tan-Renga a lot and find it to be humorous. Melis Barutcu, Fall 2024 I thought this addition was funny. To the author, the sand is only a minor inconvenience and maybe even a little reminder of the fun trip they just had. I feel like sometimes I can be oblivious to my surroundings, so I also imagined bruising the sand away and not even realizing I was annoying the person next to me. I think that makes it slightly funnier/adds to the embarrassment because you suddenly look over and see the annoyed look of the person next to you. It’s just one more reminder that it’s time to get back to reality now that vacation is over. Natalie Mase, Fall 2024 This Tan-Renga made me laugh, especially because of the added part of the haiku. The sand is dusted out of the book and lands on the random guy sitting next to you. You are reminiscing on your wonderful beach vacation. However, the guy next to you is just annoyed that you got him all dirty. He did not want to reminisce about the vacation with you. Lily Moore, Fall 2024 I thought the rhyming on this was creative which immediately drew me to Tan-renga, but when I read over it again I realized that the poem itself was great as well. The image of a disgruntled old man sticks in my brain all the time. Maybe this guy was being a bit of a jerk or making too much noise, so this was a subtle way of getting back at him. Thinking of it like this leaves some funny possible interpretations. Matt Kordesh, Fall 2024 |
12 the only worry Abby Wilken the only worry Abby & Abby the only worry Abby Wilken & Katelyn Wendt This basically continues the same idea as the original, but I think it’s interesting how using the metaphor of “washing away worry/sand” adds in tension retroactively (making the sand between the toes some lingering anxiety rather than an insignificant issue) while also instantly resolving it. Dan Mungons, Fall 2024 This tan-renga does an exceptional job of illustrating the relaxation associated with a good vacation. The original haiku already did a good job of that by stating that the only worry is the sand in between their toes. The fourth line then describes a wave. Usually, a wave in this case would be associated with something negative. At first, I thought the wave would disrupt the peace and relaxation. Then, the fifth line says that the wave does nothing but wash away the sand, thus proving that there really is no worry associated with this moment. Dayton Lasack, Fall 2024 I liked the way that this ten-range flowed and stayed on theme. I also feel that the added two lines brought another aspect of calmness and lack of worries. Before the only "worry" was the sand, and now the sand is not even the worry. The relaxing nature of being at the beach washing away everything and leaving nothing but the experience of being present in the moment. Maliyah Battle, Fall 2024 I liked this addition to the original haiku because I think it’s a nice continuation of the same idea of relaxation and not actually having any real worries. The only worry that the author has is small to begin with, but then the wave comes and washes it away anyway. They never really had to worry about it at all because nature came to the rescue and erased even that tiny worry. It reminds me of being on the beach and just standing at the edge of the water. I love this feeling, and I felt like this tan renga really captured it well. Natalie Mase, Fall 2024 the only worry Abby & Izzy |
© 2024, Randy Brooks • Millikin University
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