Haiku to Edit 1

Global Haiku • Millikin University • July 2018

cut • add • replace • rearrange

cut non-essentials • add context or scene • replace with stronger images • rearrange the order of perception

 

scrolling on old friends' facebooks
I find their pictured lives
better than mine

 

 

 



on these lonely nights
I let the rain
caress me to sleep

 

 

 

 

Sad songs only
Act as temporary
Heal

 

 

 

 

shoes scattered around
the sound of kid’s laughter
fills the air

 

 

 

laying on the beach
enjoying the lovely views
only coming home with sunburns

 

 

 

 

September dove hunt
seeing sunflowers in the field
bird down beer in hand

 

 

 

 

sunset over the trees
fresh coffee brewing
vacation

 

 

 

 

Summer fun
lemonade stand
a breeze under the shade tree

 

 

 

 

          life
       lessons
in grandpa’s barn

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

perfume and air fresheners
seatbelts and glass
no pulse

 

 

 

 

 

 


smoke and onion
brings a smile
cooking at dinner

 

 

 

 

warm bed—good sleep
nature calls
cold seat

 

 

 

combine these 2 attempts into 1 new haiku:

black and dry
bacon and potatoes
. . . favorite moments

burnt onions
swings and weekends
quality time

 

 

 

combine these 2 attempts into 1 new haiku:

bug-eyed child 
stand still watches 
grandmother

old sewing machine  
she works from
curious child she learns

 

 


© 2018, Randy Brooks • Millikin University
All rights returned to authors upon publication.